“Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup;
You have made my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
Surely I have a delightful inheritance.”

~Psalm 16:5-6~

As I drew nearer and nearer to God this season, I have a clearer vision on the purpose God has for me. At times, most of us were often clouded with uncertainty in the place we were in. We question ourselves, “Is this the right course I’m studying in? God, is this the workplace you want me to be in?”

As for me, whenever obstacles struck in my journey, I will doubt. Perhaps I’m not supposed to be here and that’s the reason why I seem to be struggling with every steps I take. There is so much uncertainty and worry in me that I forget the lot God has assigned for me and was often blinded to see his purpose for me. Without knowing his will, I run in my flesh and soon I grow weary and my spirit man grow faint.

Last sun sermon, as I step forward for the ministry section, God opened up my spiritual eyes. “My child, have you not see the purpose I have for you? It’s not by chance where you are now; it’s me who has assigned you to be in that place.”

Just to share a little background about myself, I’m currently in third year in NTU. My studies are not good at all and I struggle in that area ever since I enter NTU. A lot of things crop up for me, like receiving an Academic warning in my first semester and end up taking 2 less modules compared to my friends. It takes me quite sometimes to get over it and in the end, I received a letter from NTU that actually I didn’t receive an Academic warning but it was too late as I had to take the 2 modules in another semester. Project works always end up not grouping with my click of friends but with students who I’m not familiar with. Applying for environmental companies for my attachment but couldn’t get in and through second opting; I end up in a construction company and have to travel all the way to Paya Lebar every morning. I was poor in structural work and it was a struggle to catch up with the Engineers there. Was all this a joke, I question God. But it’s definitely not because God designed it to be this way…

During the ministry section, I sense such a strong affirmation from God that he has already blessed and plan my future and there is no need to be worry about it. What he wants me to undergo now is because he is more interested in building up my character for the future he has for me. It is not by chance that I have to go through all these; it is because every time I struggle through this period, I get closer to God one step bigger. I learn more on trusting him and following his will. God has assigned us our portion. It is only when we understand this purpose, we can make use of where we are to fulfil his will and plan for us!

God bless you,
Si Jia